According to the data published by NCRB, the suicide rate among students in India from the year 2016 to 2021 has reached to 13,089 from 9,478. The report also indicates that a significant number of suicides had “failure in examination” as the major reason. Suicides among students are not uncommon with the most common reason facing failure in examination. In the mental health care industry there is much talked about student wellbeing, opting for suitable yet best career choices, focusing more on the skills and capabilities of our own than focusing on what others are doing, coping with academic issues and availing psychological support in case of need. Inspite of this, its pitiful to learn about increased suicide rates among students. Recently, suicide cases in Kota that came in light have again turned heads of people and it indicates a need to introspect and find out “where are we going wrong?”

This also leads to questions like:

1. Are students failing to assert their academic potential and interests in front of their parents and cope with academic stress?
2. Are parents failing to convey to their children that they are always there for them, no matter its success or failure?
3. Are colleges/coaching institutes indirectly putting pressure on students by being best in the race and ranking top positions?
4. Are mental health care professionals failing to spread awareness about need to chose a suitable career option, coping with academic distress and access to psychological help in case of need?

In today’s time where we talk about open communication, bridging communication gap between parents and children, creating a friendly and lively environment in classrooms to facilitate communication between teachers and students, availability of mental health care facilities where students can not only find help to decide for a suitable career option but also find ways to cope with academic stress and deal with failure; its heart wrenching to see the young minds giving up and ending their lives.

There are many people who play an important role in a child’s life. Parents, teachers, siblings, peers, friends, other family members, their role models etc; however, the most important association they have is with their parents, and it needs no explanation why. There is nothing that is not known by the parents what a child need in stress provoking situations. There are few things that I would like to enlighten based on my own professional experience.

• Knowing that a child need support won’t help, knowing “how” to extend it will surely do. No matter how much experienced you are at parenting, there is always scope for learning something new and implementing it in an appropriate way.
• When you give freedom to your children to choose educational streams and careers of their interest, don’t agree to it just because its need of the time and most people are advising it. Understand your child’s perspective behind making that choice and then come to an agreement.
• When your child needs emotional support, restrict yourself only to that. Seeking support not always means seeking advice. Sometimes they only need a hug and some time with you.
• When you say to your child that don’t take pressure of studies and do best to your potential, refrain from discussing about grades of other kids and how they are performing, especially in front of them.
• Prepare your child not only for success; prepare them from failure as well. Help them understand that failures are a part of life and its okay to fail and try harder next time.
• When your child faces failure be there with them. Say I am with you, and “mean it”

For any queries feel free to reach out to me at info@talktocure.com

Neelam Verma, Clinical Psychologist